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Present Authoring

The purpose of this assignment is to help you make sense of your life story; both the parts that have already happened, and the parts that have yet to be written.

All stories are classified as either comedies or tragedies. And, if you don’t take time to write your script, your personal story is more likely to become a tragedy. Or an “extra” in someone else’s story. Wouldn’t you rather be the hero? This assignment will help you!

Part 1: Present Authoring

Consider your personality as it currently stands. Which of the following are currently problems for you? Write down the numbers that make you go “YES. That’s so me.”

Many of these are redundant! If you pick two statements that are similar, choose the one that resonates with you most, or the one that you can best tell a story for.

1. I alienate people by assuming the worst in them.
2. I avoid social events that I’d probably be better off attending.
3. I cheat on things and one day I’m going to get caught (if I haven’t already).
4. I could have a better sense of humor about things.
5. I do things that are probably a bit too dangerous.
6. I don’t finish anything I start.
7. I don’t get my work done because I screw around too much (Netflix, social media, video games, etc.).
8. I don’t let others get close to me.
9. I don’t make enough use of my creativity.
10. I don’t spend enough time appreciating art or music.
11. I don’t spend enough time appreciating nature.
12. I don’t think about the consequences of my actions.
13. I eat too much.
14. I fall for sob stories too easily.
15. I fixate on things that make me feel bad.
16. I get stressed out too easily.
17. I have a short temper and get angry easily.
18. I have an unhealthy relationship with drugs. (either legal or illegal — and yes, this includes alcohol and/or caffeine!)
19. I have trouble accepting sincere apologies, and it hurts my relationships.
20. I have trouble making friends.
21. I have trouble making up my mind.
22. I hide my emotions too much.
23. I judge people I know I probably shouldn’t, such as the homeless.
24. I make bad life decisions.
25. I make impulsive decisions I later regret.
26. I never do things by the deadline (bills, homework, etc.).
27. I often feel sad or depressed.
28. I overanalyze everything.
29. I really am too honest! I feel bad even when I tell a white lie that spares someone’s feelings, so I avoid doing so.
30. I spend more than I can afford.
31. I spend too much of my life behind a screen (phone, computer, tv).
32. I start arguments I don’t need to.
33. I stay at home too much.
34. I take things too seriously.
35. I use education as a form of procrastination; preferring to “study” and learn more, when I really should just be taking action on something.
36. I work on failing projects for too long, refusing to admit defeat and thus wasting a lot of time.
37. I worry a bit too much about cleanliness (hand washing, sanitizer, etc.) and I’m afraid people judge me for it.
38. I worry too much.
39. I’m a workaholic and don’t give myself enough time to relax.
40. I’m afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing.
41. I’m afraid to speak up.
42. I’m always unprepared and have trouble keeping track of things.
43. I’m crushed by setbacks.
44. I’m hard to get to know.
45. I’m insincere and tell people what they want to hear so I’ll get what I want.
46. I’m not able to stand up for myself.
47. I’m not as educated as I should be.
48. I think I’m pretty smart and I’m wasting this potential.
49. I’m not good at leading others.
50. I’m so worried about making bad decisions that I end up not deciding on anything.
51. I’m too arrogant and treat others as inferiors.
52. I’m too easily annoyed.
53. I’m too easily embarrassed.
54. I’m too messy/disorganized and it causes me problems.
55. I’m too modest to tell others about my strengths (for instance, at a job interview).
56. I’m too much of a pushover.
57. I’m too settled into my daily habits and routines.
58. I’m too stubborn about trying or considering new things.
59. I’m too trusting and sometimes get burned by others.
60. My dreams or expectations of the world are unrealistic.
61. My life is too structured and I don’t have enough room for spontaneity.

After you’ve written down your current problems, narrow your list down until you have between 3 and 7 that are most true for you. Remember, pick ones you can write about and don’t make them overlap too much.

Now, for each statement you chose, write about:

1. A specific time when this personality trait caused a problem for you. Write about the facts of what happened. Don’t spend much time analyzing it yet (you’ll do that later).
2. What you wish you did instead.
3. A specific plan for the next time you find yourself in a similar situation. You should probably do a bit of research. For instance, doing a Google search for “how to be more organized.”
4. Don’t “BS” your way through this part and say you’re going to do something you know you won’t. This assignment is meant to help you, so be realistic and come up with a plan you think you can stick to — even if you’re worried it’s a little underwhelming. If you’re messy and your solution is “I’m going to clean for 30 seconds every morning before I leave for class,” GOOD! 30 seconds is better than what you’re doing now! But don’t lie to yourself and say you’ll spend 15 minutes when you know you won’t.

Each story/trait you select will probably be at least half a page. Don’t feel like you need to hit any certain length; just write what you need to. But, if you want a rough idea, I’d expect this part of the assignment to be between 2 and 5 pages.

Label each section with a header. It’ll look something like:

—

Weakness 1: I’m too nice.

Blah blah blah blah blah.

Yadda yadda. Paragraph paragraph.

Weakness 2: I’m too easily embarrassed.

Blah blah blah blah blah.

Yadda yadda. Paragraph paragraph.

—

(You get the idea)

Part 1b: Present Authoring

Consider your personality as it currently stands. Which of the following are currently strengths for you? Write down the numbers that make you go “YES. That’s so me.”

Many of these are redundant! If you pick two statements that are similar, choose the one that resonates with you most, or the one that you can best tell a story for.

1. I appreciate art and beauty.
2. I can achieve most things I put my mind to.
3. I can adapt quickly to new situations.
4. I can control my cravings and/or urges to spend too much money.
5. I can go with the flow, keeping my opinions to myself and letting others take charge.
6. I can jump into things without planning and still make them turn out well.
7. I can make decisions without my emotions getting in the way.
8. I can make others feel comfortable.
9. I can make things look beautiful.
10. I can manage lots of things at the same time.
11. I can see how things might go wrong.
12. I can solve complex and difficult problems.
13. I catch mistakes and fix them.
14. I choose my words with care and don’t say things I’ll later regret.
15. I come up with good solutions.
16. I do fine in chaotic and disorganized environments.
17. I don’t award my trust too easily.
18. I don’t fall for sob stories.
19. I don’t give up.
20. I don’t let people take advantage of me.
21. I don’t sweat the “small stuff.”
22. I enforce rules fairly and equally.
23. I feel others’ emotions.
24. I have a great imagination.
25. I have a great sense of humor.
26. I have a lot of self-confidence.
27. I have a unique perspective on things.
28. I have valuable insights.
29. I keep my cool and don’t get angry with people.
30. I know how to get things done, even if it means bending the rules a little.
31. I know how to let loose and enjoy myself.
32. I know how to look out for myself.
33. I know how to take it easy and relax.
34. I listen to my conscience and always do the right thing.
35. I make people laugh.
36. I meet a lot of people and have a large social circle of people who like me.
37. I see the “gray areas” in life and I’m okay with ambiguity.
38. I see the best in people.
39. I seek a lot of fun and interesting experiences.
40. I set high standards for other people and help them to reach them.
41. I stand up for myself when I’ve been wronged.
42. I take my obligations seriously.
43. I value tradition.
44. I’d rather enjoy life than spend my time working too hard.
45. I’m a decisive person.
46. I’m a hard worker.
47. I’m a practical person.
48. I’m a quick learner.
49. I’m able to focus on one goal at a time and not get distracted by new ones.
50. I’m accepting of others.
51. I’m an optimist, always looking on the bright side.
52. I’m emotionally stable, experiencing very few highs and lows.
53. I’m extremely creative.
54. I’m extremely resilient; I bounce back even when really bad things happen to me.
55. I’m good at analyzing things.
56. I’m good at blending in and not drawing too much attention to myself.
57. I’m good at cooperating with others.
58. I’m good at defending others against bullies.
59. I’m good at figuring out how things work.
60. I’m good at fitting in and doing what’s expected of me.
61. I’m good at generating lots of options for what to do next.
62. I’m good at identifying exactly what’s bothering me.
63. I’m good at leading others.
64. I’m good at making friends.
65. I’m good at planning things in advance.
66. I’m good at recognizing bad/unhealthy/dangerous situations.
67. I’m good at talking people into doing things.
68. I’m good at thinking of ways to improve things.
69. I’m grateful for what I have, so I try helping others who have less.
70. I’m great with money and budgeting.
71. I’m handy around the house.
72. I’m highly aware of my emotions and motivations.
73. I’m honest, even when it’s really hard to do.
74. I’m intellectually curious and want to learn new things.
75. I’m modest and down-to-earth.
76. I’m not easily bothered by things.
77. I’m organized in most, if not all, areas of my life.
78. I’m relatively carefree and happy.
79. I’m socially confident and good at getting what I want from others.
80. I’m trusting of others.
81. I’m willing to try anything once.
82. Money isn’t a big motivator for me, freeing me to do whatever I want.
83. My friends enjoy my spontaneity.
84. People can rely on me to stay calm under pressure.

After you’ve written down your current problems, narrow your list down until you have between 3 and 7 that are most true for you. Remember, pick ones you can write about and don’t make them overlap too much.

Now, for each statement you chose, write about:

1. A specific time when this personality trait was beneficial for you. Write about the facts of what happened. Don’t spend much time analyzing it yet (you’ll do that later).
2. A specific plan for making the most of this strength in the future. Consider your future career, your hobbies, your friends, etc.

Each story/trait you select will probably be at least half a page. Don’t feel like you need to hit any certain length; just write what you need to. But, if you want a rough idea, I’d expect this part of the assignment to be between 2 and 5 pages.

The biggest problem I’ve noticed so far is that people aren’t writing enough. You really should have at least 100 words for each strength you pick. If you run out of things to say, try clacking on the keyboard and pretending to write until a new idea comes to you. This works pretty well!

The more effort you put into this assignment, the more it will help you. A good rule of thumb is that you should write more words about fewer things, but ideally you’re writing a lot about a lot of things. 🙂

Label each section with a header. It’ll look something like:

—

Strength 1: I make people laugh.

Blah blah blah blah blah.

Yadda yadda. Paragraph paragraph.

Strength 2: I’m organized in most, if not all, areas of my life.

Blah blah blah blah blah.

Yadda yadda. Paragraph paragraph.

Past Authoring

Past Authoring is an exercise designed to help you understand your personal history more clearly.

Every experience that you have had contains information. If you have fully processed the information in that experience:

• Its recollection will no longer produce negative emotion, and…
• You have learned everything you need to know from it, at least for now.

Any past experience more than a year old (approximately) that still produces negative emotion still has information embedded in it. Writing about such experiences helps extract that information. Writing helps move the information from vague, emotion-laden and imagistic representation, to high-resolution conscious narrative form.

Reflect on your life and pick at least 10 experiences that impacted you in some way — either good or bad. It may help to review your life by:

• Your age
• What grade you were in
• What year it was

…to make sure you don’t forget anything important.

Write at least 100 words (on average) describing each experience. I won’t stress out if a few are shorter, as long as a few are longer as well. Remember what I said: it’s not about the word requirement, it’s about making sure this assignment helps you.

I suggest you start writing this section by just telling the stories. I think it will help to have your life organized and on paper before you start trying to learn from it. Next, you’ll discuss how you think each experience impacted you and what you learned from it.

Tips for rewriting: For each story you wrote, re-read it and add any details you might have skipped over if you were in a rush. The more complete your story is, the better you’ll be able to emotionally process it, and the better feedback/advice you’ll get from your peer reviewer. (Remember, you can remove anything you’re super-uncomfortable with sharing, but I encourage you to be open about yourself and stretch a little past your comfort zone!)

Then, for each story, analyze what happened with the benefit of hindsight. Questions you should consider include:

• How did this influence you into becoming the person you are today?
• Is it possible you would have become this person even if the event didn’t happen? Are you just using it as an excuse? (Hint: the answer to this is yes much more often than we care to admit!)
• What did this teach you about yourself? Or, is it symptomatic of an underlying personality trait you now know you have?
• What did this teach you about the world in general? Or other people?
• Anything else you learned from this?

You don’t have to answer all of those prompts, but dig in deep and explore how your brain is processing each event.

This is one of the hardest sections of the essay. You’re probably going to have to confront some of your demons. Be honest with yourself, but also be nice and forgive yourself!

The general rule for each story is to continue analyzing it until you notice you’re not feeling as emotional about it as you used to. That’s a sign you’ve learned from the experience and you’re preparing to move on from it.

Seriously — write a lot of analysis! Each story should probably have at least half-a-page, but it won’t surprise me if it takes you a lot more.

In terms of how to organize this section, analyze each story immediately after telling it. So that means your final essay will look like this:

• Story 1
• Analysis 1
• Story 2
• Analysis 2
• Story 3
• Analysis 3

NOT like this (the order I suggested you write it in):

• Story 1
• Story 2
• Story 3
• Analysis 1
• Analysis 2
• Analysis 3

Because that’s going to be harder to read and follow along with.

If you have any other questions, just let me know!

Future Authoring

This is all part of the Future Authoring section (part 3 of your essay).

• Part 3a: Visualizing what kind of life you want for yourself.
• Part 3b: Visualizing the nightmare scenario that might happen if you’re not careful.
• Part 3c: What’s your 10-year plan? Remember this should only be a word or two. “Freedom,” “family,” “security,” etc.
• Part 3d: What’s your 2-5 year plan? What seems like a good idea, right now, for getting that freedom (or security, etc.) you desire?
• Part 3e: Your ridiculously specific plan for the next year or so.

Part 3a: Ideal life

Close your eyes. Daydream, if you can, and imagine your ideal future:

• Who do you want to be?
• What do you want to do?
• Where do you want to end up?
• Why do you want these things?
• How do you plan to achieve your goals?
• When will you put your plans into action?

Use your 5 senses here. Walk yourself and the reader through exactly what your day looks like.

Part 3b: Worst-case scenario

You have now written about the future you would like to have. Clearly defining your future can help reduce the uncertainty in your life, and reduce the amount of negative emotion that you chronically experience, in consequence. This is good for your confidence and for your health. Having well-defined goals also increases your chances of experiencing positive emotion, as people experience most of their hope and joy and curiosity and engagement as a consequence of pursuing valued goals (and not, as people generally think, by attaining them).

It can also be very useful to deeply imagine the future you would like to avoid. You probably know people who have made very bad decisions, and who end up with a life that nobody would want. You also likely have weaknesses yourself. If you let those get out of control, then you might also end up with a miserable, painful life. Most people know how their life could go downhill if they let it.

Spend some time, now, thinking about what your life would be like if you failed to define or pursue your goals, if you let your bad habits get out of control, and if you ended up miserable, resentful, and bitter. Imagine your life three to five years down the road, if you failed to stay on the path you know you should be on. Use your imagination. Draw on your knowledge of the anxiety and pain you have experienced in the past, when you have betrayed yourself.

Think about the people you know who have made bad decisions or remained indecisive, or who chronically deceive themselves or other people, or who let cynicism and anger dominate their lives. Where do you not want to be?

Dream while you write, and don’t stop. Write at least until the 15 minutes have passed. Let yourself form a very clear picture of the undesirable future.

Part 3c: 10-year plan

What’s the one word that sums up what you want in life? Planning more than a year or two in advance tends to be worthless because life takes us in directions we could never anticipate. This one word represents your “north star” — your goal that you don’t expect to ever change. But as we plan closer to the present day, our goals can get more and more specific because we’ll have more control over them.

Part 3d: 2-year plan

Write 1, 2, or 3 goals for yourself, to help you attain that one word. Make sure these goals are SMART:

• Specific. The goal should be unambiguous. Address the who, what, and wheres of the goal.
• Measurable. You need a way to measure your progress and know when you attain success. “Being rich” isn’t a measurable goal, but “Making $80,000/year” is.
• Attainable or Ambitious. You want to set a goal that is challenging but not impossible. Set a goal you’d be excited to achieve, but you know you’ll have to work hard for.
• Relevant. Your goal should be intensely personal; don’t set a goal that someone else (e.g., your parents) want for you.
• Time-bound. You need a clear deadline for your goal. Otherwise, you won’t feel any sense of urgency to get it done. I personally recommend setting goals that are no more than 3 years into the future. None of us can predict how different our lives will be beyond a short time frame (1-3 years). In undergrad, I had NO IDEA I’d become a psychology professor.

We will use author Jason Selk’s term for these goals: these are your product goals, because they focus on the end product. You only have the time and willpower for up to 3 such goals, so that’s why we’re keeping it simple. Like I said in class, even 1 goal is plenty here. It’s good to be focused!

Part 3e: 1-year plan

Now, for each of your product goals, break it down into 1 to 3 process goals. These goals turn out to be the most important step in getting the life you want.. These are the actions you’ll need to take every day in order to reach that goal. Again, be VERY specific. Here’s an example:

“My product goal is become a Registered Nurse who makes at least $70,000/year by December 31st, 2019. To reach this goal, my process goals include:

• Study for at least 2 hours every weekday, starting at 4pm, at the school library.
• Spend 10 minutes every morning looking at job postings on indeed.com, or send a networking email if there are no new postings.

Also, ask yourself what potential obstacles stand in the way of your goal. What can throw you off track?

By anticipating and planning for these obstacles, they won’t discourage you when they actually happen. You’ll be ready for them.

In your paper, describe the obstacles that might throw you off track, and then create a bullet point list of “if-then” statements so you’ll know what to do. For example:

• If I fail a class, then I’ll spend 20% more time studying the next time I take it.
• If I don’t exercise for 3 days in a row, then I’ll add an alarm on my phone and schedule it into my daily agenda.
• If I don’t find a job within 6 months of graduating, then I’ll take a low-stress, part-time job and go to grad school.